66th Plate Appearance

Ubaldo has departed Nationals Park, clutching a bushel of goose eggs to his chest. Franklin Morales shakes off a sense of deja vu as he comes to the field. Staked to a two-run lead, he'll face Adam first.

Adam charges up his left-hand batting glove with a few spits. The second pitch from Morales jams him. A jammed Adam Dunn can still lift the ball to the warning track. But a jam is a jam, and the snap of Carlos Gonzalez's glove confirms that this center-field shot closes the book on another 0-for-4 Dunnstravaganza.

Six miles away, past the nation's capitol, past the national mall, past the Ronald Reagan Building and International Trade Center, Little Zimmy lies in bed in a quiet room in Georgetown University Hospital. He watches Pudge ground out, Justin Maxwell push a pinch-hit single to the outfield, and Ian Desmond strike out to finish the day. He turns off the TV set and rolls over on his side to stare at the wall.

"Why is he so upset?" says one nurse to the other. "Surely he knows his hamstring will have healed by tomorrow."

The other nurse, as buxom as the first, shakes her head. "You'll never understand, will you?"

58th Plate Appearance

Bottom of the ninth. Nats down by six runs. Adam Dunn at bat. Every last one of the Five Hundred Faithful has remained in Nationals Park to witness this moment.

Sensing the gravity of the situation, manager Jim Tracy sends out Rockies closer Franklin Morales to face Adam. Adam chops the first pitch foul, just to show Morales what might happen.

Morales is shaken. His next pitch goes in the dirt.

Pitch three is fouled off, and pitch four Adam threatens with a checked swing. Watch your tushes, baseballs.

Pingpang! Adam uppercuts a pitch into the skies. Ryan Spillborghs fields the fly. Adam trots back to the dugout, and an elderly man in the front row studiously avoids eye contact. Another Dunnstravaganza is entered in the books.

48th Plate Appearance

The Brewers started this game by scoring ten runs, the most they've ever recorded in a first inning, and more than they have in any inning over the past eight years. But, undaunted, and burning with the desire to honorably serve their polis, the Nationals have answered with five runs over the intervening innings. Little Zimmy starts the Washington half of the 7th by looking at a strikeout. It's a golden opportunity for Adam to lead the charge.

Adam jumps on the first pitch from Claudio Vargas, and it screams, a line drive down the first base line.

Fielder nimbly pivots and catches the liner on the fly.

44th Plate Appearance

Adam takes command of the batter's box. First pitch a strike that sails right down the middle of the plate. Second pitch a slider outside. Afraid of going inside on the Big Butted Lumberman, mr. pitcher?

Third pitch golfed into center field for the out, to wrap up an action-packed 0 for 4 Dunnstravaganza.