59th Plate Appearance

The nation's capital is cold and wet tonight, and its residents have gathered at Nationals Park to bask in our protagonist's radiant heat. Pitcher Jason Hammel of the Rockies is charged the impossible task of keeping Adam off the basepaths.

Lil Zimmy - ignorant of fate - draws a walk in the bottom of the first. Adam approaches the plate with purpose, and carems the first pitch off first baseman Jason Giambi's glove. The ball dribbles away and the second baseman's throw cannot beat Speedy Dunnzales.

A rare infield single - relished by all.