In Doctor Fausto's absence, Justin Germano climbs the honorable mound. Yea, he steps with honor to the cloud-darkened rubber, where once--
whoops! Adam swung at the first pitch and lobbed it to center field. The Indians defense barely makes the catch.
Ozymandias tells Adam he's through for the day. Some bozo will pinch-designated-hit the rest of this game.
Well, now, what could a blonde beast do with an empty dugout and no more at-bats?
FIE!
Showing posts with label flyout. Show all posts
Showing posts with label flyout. Show all posts
Friday, April 1, 2011
Thursday, April 22, 2010
66th Plate Appearance
Ubaldo has departed Nationals Park, clutching a bushel of goose eggs to his chest. Franklin Morales shakes off a sense of deja vu as he comes to the field. Staked to a two-run lead, he'll face Adam first.
Adam charges up his left-hand batting glove with a few spits. The second pitch from Morales jams him. A jammed Adam Dunn can still lift the ball to the warning track. But a jam is a jam, and the snap of Carlos Gonzalez's glove confirms that this center-field shot closes the book on another 0-for-4 Dunnstravaganza.
Six miles away, past the nation's capitol, past the national mall, past the Ronald Reagan Building and International Trade Center, Little Zimmy lies in bed in a quiet room in Georgetown University Hospital. He watches Pudge ground out, Justin Maxwell push a pinch-hit single to the outfield, and Ian Desmond strike out to finish the day. He turns off the TV set and rolls over on his side to stare at the wall.
"Why is he so upset?" says one nurse to the other. "Surely he knows his hamstring will have healed by tomorrow."
The other nurse, as buxom as the first, shakes her head. "You'll never understand, will you?"
Adam charges up his left-hand batting glove with a few spits. The second pitch from Morales jams him. A jammed Adam Dunn can still lift the ball to the warning track. But a jam is a jam, and the snap of Carlos Gonzalez's glove confirms that this center-field shot closes the book on another 0-for-4 Dunnstravaganza.
Six miles away, past the nation's capitol, past the national mall, past the Ronald Reagan Building and International Trade Center, Little Zimmy lies in bed in a quiet room in Georgetown University Hospital. He watches Pudge ground out, Justin Maxwell push a pinch-hit single to the outfield, and Ian Desmond strike out to finish the day. He turns off the TV set and rolls over on his side to stare at the wall.
"Why is he so upset?" says one nurse to the other. "Surely he knows his hamstring will have healed by tomorrow."
The other nurse, as buxom as the first, shakes her head. "You'll never understand, will you?"
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
58th Plate Appearance
Bottom of the ninth. Nats down by six runs. Adam Dunn at bat. Every last one of the Five Hundred Faithful has remained in Nationals Park to witness this moment.
Sensing the gravity of the situation, manager Jim Tracy sends out Rockies closer Franklin Morales to face Adam. Adam chops the first pitch foul, just to show Morales what might happen.
Morales is shaken. His next pitch goes in the dirt.
Pitch three is fouled off, and pitch four Adam threatens with a checked swing. Watch your tushes, baseballs.
Pingpang! Adam uppercuts a pitch into the skies. Ryan Spillborghs fields the fly. Adam trots back to the dugout, and an elderly man in the front row studiously avoids eye contact. Another Dunnstravaganza is entered in the books.
Sensing the gravity of the situation, manager Jim Tracy sends out Rockies closer Franklin Morales to face Adam. Adam chops the first pitch foul, just to show Morales what might happen.
Morales is shaken. His next pitch goes in the dirt.
Pitch three is fouled off, and pitch four Adam threatens with a checked swing. Watch your tushes, baseballs.
Pingpang! Adam uppercuts a pitch into the skies. Ryan Spillborghs fields the fly. Adam trots back to the dugout, and an elderly man in the front row studiously avoids eye contact. Another Dunnstravaganza is entered in the books.
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